By Walter Becker, Larry Klein, & Madeline Peyroux
You can't do me, you can't do me, you can't do me the way you did before
You can't do me, you can't do me, you can't do me the way you did before
'Cause when you do, and when you do, 'cause when you do, you know I get so blue!
When you do, and when you do, 'cause when you do, you know I get so blue and I go
Down like a deep sea diver, out like a Coltrane tenor-man,
Lost like a Chinese war, baby gone, gone, gone!
Blewed like a Mississippi sharecropper, screwed like a high-school cheerleader,
Tattooed like a popeyed sailorman − gone, gone, gone!
I should have been, I should have been, I should have been a pair of ragged claws.
I should have been, I should have been, I should have been a pair of ragged claws.
And for a while, for just a while, for a good long while you'd see me smile, smile, smile
I'd crawl the seas on my bony knees, no apologies for my brave new style. I wouldn't go
Bust like an internet millionaire, boom like a Lebanese belly-dancer,
Bang like a new year's firecracker − gone, gone, gone! I wouldn't get
Bent like a rattan rockin' chair, blanked like a last place also ran,
Burned like an Arkansas griddlecake − gone, gone, gone!
I should have been, I should have been, I should have been a pair of ragged claws.
And if I was, if I was, if I was then I'd complain no more.
And for a while, for just a while, for a good long while you'd see me smile, smile, smile.
I'd crawl the seas, on my bony knees, no apologies for my brave new style. I wouldn't get
Wrecked like a rebel on a racetrack, jacked like a '51 Cadillac,
Macked like a bunny in a mansion − gone, gone, gone!
Spitooned like an Alabama 'backy wad, harpooned in a Melville sailor yard,
Cartooned like a Charlie Brown Christmas card − gone, gone, gone!
Schooled like a milk money bully whip, sued like a teenage downloader,
Unglued like a bull in a china shop − gone, gone, gone!
Cranked like a speed freak high-roller, yanked like a little league ball swatter,
Spanked like a fly on a bar counter − gone, gone, gone!
Duked like a pistol whipped card swapper, rebuked like a Bible Belt border crosser Juked like a payola chart topper − gone, gone, gone
I was reflecting today on the difference between Walter and Donald as song writers. I think if you listen to this (and maybe to Bare Bones) as compared to the Fagen tune Do Wrong Shoes (either the Jackie Allen version or the Carmela Rappazzo version), you really get it. Its easy to call it "the edge," but I think we just use "the edge" to shorthand the way Walter cuts to the bone.
In Bare Bones, there's a lyric:
I remember what my daddy taught me
'Bout how warm whisky is in a cold ditch
And one more thing about good and evil
You can't tell which is which
They preached the gospel down in Metairie
They preached it in school
It never made much sense to me
Wonder if it was supposed to
Compare that to the lyric in Do Wrong Shoes:
Like a rock star
Zoom around in a fast car
Find a guy in a blues bar
He'll remind me of you
I'll drink mai tais
At a party in Van Nuys
Struggle home around sunrise
With a new tattoo
There are elements of similarity there. We name check a liquor and a particular city. And I know these songs don't share a purpose and aren't competing. But there's something about Bare Bones where the lyrics cut to the heart of the character and the situation. I don't know. I'm not fully able to express what it is I'm feeling here. Just go listen to these two tracks and think about the songwriter, and why it was that these two men could, together, accomplish so damn much.